Dr Sarah Shan
A university of China associate professor’s unforgettable encounter with God in CKRM Malacca
I am an associate professor of a university in China. Initially, I knew nothing about CKRM but under the amazing leading of God, I stumbled upon this ministry and joined the 5th Joshua Camp. During the camp, I experienced God’s awesome power and blessing. Below is my testimony of what I had experienced from the time I planned to join the camp until the camp was over.
1. Decide to join the 5th Joshua Camp
In April, while I was searching online for information on Agape Renewal Center (ARC), USA I stumbled upon Ps Paul’s blog as it contained an article about the disassociation of Agape Leadership with CKRM. I got interested in the ministry of CKRM and read Ps Paul’s blog thoroughly. Firstly, I read about how God called Ps Paul and Ps Esther and how they obeyed the leading of God to set up CKRM. I also read the testimonies of other brothers and sisters at the same time – I was not looking for signs and wonders but whether this ministry bore any fruits in the process of building up our lives. From the testimonies, I realized that the lives of many brothers and sisters were turned around and not merely just signs and wonders at the surface level. With such positive results, I had the thoughts of going to CKRM to explore. In the beginning, I wanted to join the 6th Joshua Camp as I was busy with lots of work during this season. However, there was no peace in my heart due to a sense of urgency to encounter God. In the end, I decided to join the much earlier -5th Joshua Camp and interestingly peace settled in my heart.
2. The enemy’s obstruction and spiritual warfare
After I have decided to join the 5th Joshua Camp and made arrangements, the enemy began to attack me. I fell into deep darkness; doubt, fear and confusion attacked me as I am a long ‘on-line’ student of ARC, USA and Agape who had disassociated itself with CKRM. The enemy attacked my mind and caused me to question whether CKRM is a ministry of God. The attacks from the enemy was very intense, I felt as if I was going to fall apart. I could only cry before God, pleading with Him to reveal whether He wanted me to go CKRM.
On the wall in my home was a scripture, Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” I cried out to God while placing my hand on this scripture and felt the peace of God again.
I also recalled that I had experienced such attacks before. When I first became a believer, I was in a heretic group. Later on, God led me out of this group. When I was leaving this group, I also experienced such attacks. Back then, I didn’t know God well and it took half a year of struggle before I could leave this group. The attacks I experienced now felt familiar and I knew God much better now as compared to the past. I knew that doubt and fear were not of God and this was not an obstruction from God but from the enemy. I also felt deep in my heart that this trip to CKRM would bring tremendous breakthrough in my life and established new connection.
After a week of spiritual warfare, I emerged victorious. But the enemy began to attack my family members. A 4 year old niece of mine was hospitalized. When I departed, she was already in the hospital for half a month. The families of the sisters who interceded for me were also attacked. I felt sad but I knew I must go – I promised God that I would put down everything to walk in the path He has prepared for me. From the time I decided to join the camp for departure, after more than a month of spiritual warfare, I was exhausted physically, emotionally and spiritually. The attack on my family was truly upsetting for me. With a heavy heart, I departed for CKRM .
3. The blessing during camp
I felt the warmth of the people when I arrived in CKRM. The pastors, brothers and sisters were very friendly with smiles on their faces and they took good care of me. In the past, I have also attended conferences & camps before and the people seemed to isolate one another. I had never felt so much love. I was very joyful throughout the camp. Besides witnessing the power of God, I also felt that the way God did things was very interesting. I laughed a lot during the camp and was released from the oppression and pressure that I had for a while. The joy of the Lord set me free from the one month of torment from the enemy.
During the camp, I received many blessings from God. A few sisters prophesied to me that God’s calling in my life is real. I had always felt that I had a calling but I wasn’t certain and often asked God. The prophesies from the sisters provided the confirmation. Later on, when Ps Esther was praying for me, she also told me that God’s calling in my life was real and told me not to run ahead of God. God used Ps Paul to impart the sword of the spirit, the fire anointing, the mind renewal weapon etc. During the camp, God also increased and activated the anointing of some previous spiritual gifting in me such as the roar of the Lion of Judah, worship anointing etc. In the past, I didn’t know that these were spiritual gifts from God and didn’t know how to use them. The fire of God activated the gifts in me.
After the camp was over, Ps Paul, Ps Esther and a few brothers and sisters continued to minister to me. God prompted Ps Paul to ask sister Elizabeth to impart the worship anointing to me and I began to dance and worshipped God. As I was dancing, Ps Paul said my gift had just been activated. Back then, I didn’t realize the importance of this gift to me. On my way home, whenever I thought of worshipping God, I would start to dance in the Spirit and felt God’s presence descended very strongly on me. After reaching home, I still could feel this way and longed to worship God even more. I realized that I longed to worship Him even more deeply and to know Him more intimately. I also realized that my love and longing for God was still not enough. There was a constant longing to be close to Him.
Ps Paul and Ps Esther also prayed for me on many other things; re-activating my roar of the Lion of Judah and prayed for the gift of prophecy and for many other areas. I knew God through Joshua Camp did not just bless me with these things, but even much more beyond my imagination. I had developed such a affection for CKRM and the brothers and sisters when I felt very reluctant to leave which I had never felt before among other meetings which I had attended in the past.
4. My understanding of CKRM
Through this camp, my understanding of CKRM has deepened. I firmly believed that this is a ministry where God blessed and used me mightily. Ps Paul and Ps Esther have the hearts that serve God and minister according to God’s heartbeat. I know I cannot compare their ministry with others as what God gives everyone of us is different but I felt that there is nothing hypocritical or false about CKRM. On the contrary, it just could not be more realistic and authentic.
Some people do not understand this kind of supernatural ministry that CKRM has and felt that it is just a pursuit after spiritual gifting, signs and wonders. But from my own experience, I know this is not the case. Take me for example, after the Joshua Camp, the Fire draws me closer to God, obey Him and live a holy life. I can feel more of His presence now and the scriptures come alive when I do my devotion. During the camp, Ps Paul, Ps Esther and the rest of the pastors were also very strict when teaching the word of God to the brothers and sisters. Some sisters who went to the third heaven brought back words expressing the Lord’s concerns. They pointed out the existing attitude of some CKRM members. This signifies that the Lord is supervising this ministry and constantly guiding the brothers and sisters to seek more of Him.
May God bless and guard CKRM thus, leading CKRM deeper and to be constantly vigilant so that CKRM will fulfill what the Lord has entrusted us to walk in the good and perfect will of God. I pray all this in Jesus holy name, Amen!
Dr Sarah Shan
(The testimony was written in Mandarin by Dr Sarah Shan. It was translated to English by our Editorial Team)